Background: My students' assignment was to write advertising slogans for various products, using similes in their ads. They made mini-billboards featuring their slogans and eye-catching artwork. Totally educational. Totally fun.
A conversation with one of my students:
He hands me his billboard. I see the slogan "Botch Tape is as strong as Jesus". I stifle a giggle.
Him: What?
Pause as I search for the right words.
Me: Well, was Jesus really known for his physical strength?
Him: (deadpan) He is very powerful.
Me: Yes, but powerful and strong are different.
Long, awkward pause as he stares at me.
Me: Have you ever noticed that companies don't really use religious figures in their ads? Do you see how it might make people who aren't that religion feel about what they're selling?
More awkward silence as he scrunches up his face in confusion as to my point. I see a possible out in discussing his artwork; unfortunately, he's gone hog wild with the markers, and it's a big, multi-colored blur.
Me: What is this you've drawn here?
Him: He's taping those two guys to the ceiling.
I search my limited knowledge of Bible stories and try desperately to remember one where Jesus sticks people to the ceiling. (My parents liked to sleep in on Sundays, and I went to one day of Vacation Bible School with the neighbor kid when I was about eight - it mostly seemed to be about making pictures of stained glass windows out of macaroni and tempera paint.) The closest explanation I can find is that this young man believes that Jesus painted the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. Sensing a gigantic can of worms opening with that line of inquiry, I try a direct approach.
Me: Why is he taping them to the ceiling?
Him: (without the slightest hint of humor) It is really strong tape.
Another awkward silence.
Me: Fine. Just go sit down.
He hands me his billboard. I see the slogan "Botch Tape is as strong as Jesus". I stifle a giggle.
Him: What?
Pause as I search for the right words.
Me: Well, was Jesus really known for his physical strength?
Him: (deadpan) He is very powerful.
Me: Yes, but powerful and strong are different.
Long, awkward pause as he stares at me.
Me: Have you ever noticed that companies don't really use religious figures in their ads? Do you see how it might make people who aren't that religion feel about what they're selling?
More awkward silence as he scrunches up his face in confusion as to my point. I see a possible out in discussing his artwork; unfortunately, he's gone hog wild with the markers, and it's a big, multi-colored blur.
Me: What is this you've drawn here?
Him: He's taping those two guys to the ceiling.
I search my limited knowledge of Bible stories and try desperately to remember one where Jesus sticks people to the ceiling. (My parents liked to sleep in on Sundays, and I went to one day of Vacation Bible School with the neighbor kid when I was about eight - it mostly seemed to be about making pictures of stained glass windows out of macaroni and tempera paint.) The closest explanation I can find is that this young man believes that Jesus painted the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. Sensing a gigantic can of worms opening with that line of inquiry, I try a direct approach.
Me: Why is he taping them to the ceiling?
Him: (without the slightest hint of humor) It is really strong tape.
Another awkward silence.
Me: Fine. Just go sit down.
4 comments:
Ha! Love it.
February 4, 2009 at 4:25 PMYou have so much more tact than I do. Those crazy Bible kids scare me. But I do like the idea of a kick butt Jesus who only needs tape to corral sinners and evil doers. That would make an interesting Bible story.
February 4, 2009 at 5:00 PMOh, keep these coming! Your middle-school student stories are the best. I laughed out loud and Jack said, "What?" I said, "Oh, my friend is funny." He said, "Let me see." I said, "No, it was something I was reading." He wasn't interested after that. :)
February 4, 2009 at 5:14 PMwell it does take strong tape to adhere someone to a ceiling
February 4, 2009 at 5:18 PMone would, uh, suppose
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